slow and steady - because there is no race
I feel like we have been sold the idea that life is a race.
A race to succeed, a race to acquire, a race to win. We must keep up with the Jones’ at all costs, whoever the hell they are. And I feel like this message assaults us from two fronts - achievements and possessions - both of which are branded as essential to our happiness via a subtle currency of FOMO, competition, and aspirational envy.
When considering achievement, sadly it seems that even the most creative and mindful of pursuits are being turned into competitions. Let's pit 12 people against each other to see who is the ‘most creative'! And let's do it in a super-short timeframe under extremely stressful circumstances! And then let's vote on their popularity (or more accurately - their potential to make bankable product)! Sewing has been made into a competition, pottery, baking, knitting (!!!), coffee making, renovating a home - gosh even finding love and getting married is a staged, competitive spectacle these days.
Where is this constant breakneck race to compete with each other taking us?
If we turn our focus now to possessions, it’s at this time of year that the messaging and FOMO is at its shrill, piercing peak. Black Friday sales. BUY NOW. TWO FOR ONE. MASSIVE SAVINGS. DON’T MISS OUT. ONCE A YEAR EVENT. ACT NOW BEFORE EVERYTHING IS GONE.
Read all these as 'you will regret all of your life choices if you don't buy this thing NOW'. Ugh. UGH. Last year I calmly unsubscribed from every single newsletter I received that included a Black Friday promotion. I’m sorry but did you mention ‘click frenzy’? Buh-bye. I saw someone mention the phrase JOMO (joy of missing out) the other day and I think that sums up my attitude perfectly. That one small act of unsubscribing really DID give me JOMO. So very satisfying.
Because I think it’s time we reclaim our ability to think and act slowly. To make thoughtful and deliberate choices. To create without pressure. To consume thoughtfully. To be bored and unproductive and not strive and hustle every waking moment of existence. Life should not be a perpetual cycle of FOMO. I don’t wish to live in a constant state of exhausted competitiveness. I want to sit, with my perfectly strong coffee and the latest copy of Galah magazine, and just read. Learn of other people's stories and triumphs and feel inspired by them, perhaps spend some time thinking about nothing of great importance, and then head back to my day-to-day. Slow, mindful, peaceful.
I don’t participate in Black Friday Sales, or any sales, really. I don’t have stock that I need to heavily discount to clear. Also why would I wish to see the garments that I worked so hard designing and making, sitting sadly on a 50% off rack? How depressing!
Nope. If you love my garments and you really want one, then I know you’ll be happy to invest. I price them fairly, and I do honestly make them to last a lifetime. The other day I told someone that my biggest goal is to have one of my dresses on display in a tiny little regional museum in the year 2177. Much like garments from the 19th century grace the quiet and dusty rooms of Mechanics Halls today (always on chipped mannequins with fixed and slightly startled stares) in 2177 I want that to be my Common Poppy dress. Or perhaps my Olga Memento dress. And yes, I won't be around to see it but gosh I hope someone treasures their dress enough for this to happen. That some volunteer curator of that little regional museum in the future finds the dress in an old box and thinks "well, that's rather special". That's what I am working towards. A goal that I won’t even be around to see.
I'm going to take this silly season slow and steady, because honestly there is no race. Starting with no Black Friday sales, and then I will take a well-deserved break and spend time with my family and friends and probably eat too much cheese, drink a little too much champagne, and think about not very much for a while. How perfectly wonderful!
